Tuesday, March 1, 2011

I'm nobody, who are you?

I've always loved this Emily Dickinson poem. 
How dreary to be somebody...
I tried to tell Dave today, but it didn't work.  I opened my mouth, but the smile that I saw on his face when he looked at me made me never want to take that happiness away from him.  I guess it's a gamble, but I feel like I'd prefer that he didn't know if there's a chance that it doesn't even matter.  Don't get me wrong, Kevin and I took precautions, but so have Dave and I, so obviously there was a failure along the line somewhere, and I don't really know where.  Who knows, maybe I was impregnated by aliens who are just trying to mess with me and observe the results... honestly with the way my life is going right now I wouldn't be surprised.  A lot of you are probably wondering why I can't just assume that the twins are Dave's and go on my way, and I guess I left out a major detail. Kevin is black, and Dave is well... about as white as they come.  Naturally when Kevin found out that I was pregnant, he was worried too, but I lied to him and told him that Dave and I had been trying for a baby.  I would have never pictured myself in such a web of lies... I feel like everyone is watching me even though they have no idea of the truth.  I really wish that I were nobody right now..

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